Can they smell fear?

Okay so Michael is going back to work tonight and I'm alone with 4 of the cutest little monsters. I'm scared to death of not having any help with the bedtime routine, dinner, baths, and entertaining. I'm sure I'll make it and it will get easier with time, but I think these particular kids can smell fear and they will use it to their advantage. So if you try to call me today and I don't answer it may be because I'm hiding in the closet and can't bear to face the week ahead of me :)

My baby is back/First Bath

Thanks to everyone for all the prayers and support. Hayden is doing great and we were able to come home from the hospital a day earlier than we had planned. They did cultures on spinal fluid, blood, and urine and they all came back negative. So it was just a little virus but it caused a horrible fever that lasted for a few days. Our stay in the hospital was not so much fun--the nursing staff was great, but Hayden was miserable. He would just lay there and whine in his sleep. I felt horrible for him and it made it impossible for me to sleep. As soon as they took out his IV he was back to his old self. He has been a great baby since coming home although he has found his voice and knows that if he cries he gets picked up. I don't mind holding him a bit, and if I could I'd hold him all day long. I'm afraid we've spoiled him and I'll be in trouble when Michael goes back to work next week. I sure wish I could keep him home a little longer, but I guess he better head back to work sometime. He will be greatly missed!

Hayden loved his first bath--he wasn't to sure at first, then just relaxed and enjoyed it. He almost fell asleep he was so relaxed. What a cute kid!

Hunter is now got a touch of the flu, so I'm in the process of disinfecting my house so we can get rid of all the flu germs that are obviously hanging around. I really hope no one else gets it, we could use some healthy days!

Prayers Needed

So yesterday afternoon I noticed Hayden was really ornery--which is NOT normal. He has been such a good baby. He doesn't cry unless you change his diaper. He hates to be cold! I finally took his temperature and sure enough it was 101. For a 10 day old baby that gets us a ticket to the ER. I ran out the door and arrived at the ER just after 6:00 last night. Finally at midnight we were admitted and upstairs. They are running all sorts of tests to find out what is going on and so far all of his counts have been okay. They are testing his urine, blood, and spinal fluid. Needless to say he has been a pin cushion the last 12 hours. Unfortunately the fever just won't budge and he is really uncomfortable. Any extra prayers would be appreciated. Most likely he just has a virus, but it's better to be safe than sorry. Thanks to everyone who is helping us out with kids and getting them around. Michael is off which is a HUGE relief so he is playing Mom and Dad and doing great. His stress of the morning was what to do with Haley's hair for school. I'm sure she looked great! He feels guilty not being at the hospital with me, but there isn't much he can do from here. At least I have Internet I can play with to stay busy.

First Day of Kindergarten

With a heavy heart I sent my baby girl off to Kindergarten today. Yes, I shed a tear and yes I know it's only 2 1/2 hours long, but she's my little girl. I was so excited for her to head off to school and she was so ready, but I'm still a little sad. Her teacher sent out a letter that explained exactly how I felt. She quoted a note that she got from another parent that said:

Dear Teacher,
Today I turn some of my little girl's life over to you. It is not easy for me, because I held her so tight when she was a newborn and I taught her, and she felt the love of her family.
But today a new chapter in her life begins. And for a few hours I will not be there to answer her questions, kiss her bruises to "save" her from some pain, but you will be there. Be kind, for she is small. She has so much to give, and so much to learn. And so for those few hours when she is yours, remember, I held her tightly. I share her dreams ... her hopes.
Give her love and help her learn. And when the day is over, send her home unharmed.

I can totally relate to this parent and feel the exact same way and I trust her teacher to teach her and care about her. So with Hannah Montana back pack in hand off she went excited to see friends and make new ones. (It helped she got to sit by "Carson" her little boyfriend from pre-school) Haley came home from her first day excited to go back tomorrow and can't wait to learn everything!

I was excited to have a little photo shoot before school and I'm glad she was all smiles because she didn't wake up that way. She woke up with a head ache and wasn't feeling very well, she wouldn't eat (even though I got up early to make her requested breakfast of pancakes, eggs, and bacon) and she just wanted to go back to bed. She was in bed by 8:00 last night and you'd think 11 hours sleep is good enough, but not for my Haley. She needs a good 12-13 hours to feel rested. A little Motrin and Gatorade and a few hugs and she got moving. We had to include her brothers in the photo shoot as well and my goodness what posers we have!

Bad Mommy

On Tuesday we went to St. George to pick up the kids. I was so grateful for the time I had to recover and spend some time with Hayden. It's the first time I feel like I actually got to recover and rest after having a baby. Anyway, my parents were kind enough to meet us halfway so we didn't have to drive all the way to Panguitch. Haley was the first to come running and give me a big hug, then she just wanted to hold Hayden and kiss him. Hunter was next with a quick hug then he was distracted and wanted Grandpa. Harmon went straight to Dad and gave him a big hug and was so happy to see him. I went to grab him for my hug and he would have nothing to do with me. In fact he cried and ran back to Grandma for protection. For the next 15-20 minutes I tried to get him to come to me and he acted like he didn't even know me. I felt awful like he was mad at me for leaving him. I tried to just hold him and he cried and wiggled until he got away. That is the perfect way to break a Mom's heart! He finally warmed up and all the sudden came running to me. I decided that is the worst possible feeling knowing that your child is so mad at you that they want nothing to do with you. Maybe that's what it is like with teenagers :) Anyway, he has been fine since then and is happy to be home even though he has to fight for attention. He loves Hayden and wants to kiss him and tickle him. It's really sweet.

Big Surprise

Born August 14, 2009

3:37 a.m.

7 lbs 7 oz

18 inches long

So we were suprised Thursday night when baby Hayden decided to arrive early. I was so excited to have everything scheduled out and the kids taken care of next week, but I guess there were other plans in the making. I had a Dr. appointment yesterday at 4:30 and when I got home I was having contractions. I assumed I was just sore from the exam and went about my evening. I went to Bunco and had contractions the whole way thru. I got home and felt like the time was coming. By 11:00 I had my friend Shalayne's daughter Madison over to say with the kids, which was a huge relief! Just a few hours later Hayden joined our family. We are so happy to have him here and as you can see he is an adorable baby! The kids were so excited to see him and Harmon was so sweet giving him kisses and hugs (I was nervous about how he'd react). We are now home from the hospital and I'm happy to have my own bed and not have to get woken up every 2 hours by a nurse. My wonderful parents rushed down yesterday to see the baby and decided to just take the kids home with them, so I'm in a very empty house. It's strange to not have them here, but great to be able to rest and give Hayden all the attention.

"Picnik Show"

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Blocked

So I've had a blogging block, actually I've avoided blogging because it would probably be pretty whiny. I am very ready for this pregnancy to be over, yet I'm not ready for a new baby in the house. I was reading an article in the Ensign the other night (3:00 am to be exact--couldn't sleep). It was on post partum depression and talked about the signs and symptoms. As I read it I felt as if I was already there--so is it possible to have post partum depression before the baby even gets here? I guess I'm feeling more overwhelmed than anything, over the last week everything seemed much worse than it actually is. Just to bore everyone here are the things I'm stressing over right now.

• I had to have a tooth pulled and I must say it was not a pleasant experience, yet I thought it would be much worse.
• I have SEVERE itching and it is making me CRAZY! The Dr. said it is just a heat rash, but I didn't think so. He finally agreed and said I have PUPPS and I am now medicated and always sleepy from the drugs. I think it's helping a little bit though.
• Harmon has developed a very high pitched scream that he thinks is funny--it's NOT especially when Michael is trying to sleep.
• I have sooo many things to do before this kid gets here and I just don't seem to have the energy to do any of it!
• Cub Scout Day camp was this week and I felt like I should be there fulfilling my calling, but I didn't go and I'm missing a meeting this week to play Bunco instead. I'm totally not magnifying my calling.
• I've started to get addicted to facebook and look forward to checking in--I think I'm cheating on my blog.

Okay, I'm annoying myself with my whining and I know I could go on all day, so here's the list of positives.

• I can't wait to hold this precious blessing from Heavenly Father in my arms. I know he is meant to be in our family!
• My Dr. has agreed to induce me a week early--his choice not mine, but no complaints here!
• I had a burst of energy this morning and got Harmon & new baby's room pulled together.
• I finally got the car seat cleaned and ready, so now we can bring baby home when the time comes (he still has nothing to wear-I'm going thru clothes tonight!!)
• I'm almost done with the baby quilt I'm making. (I'm just tying it-nothing to special)
• Haley is all ready for school and VERY excited!
• My wonderful husband has stepped up and is helping me a ton with everything.
• My Brother and Sister-in Law just had their cute little baby and I am sooooo happy for them! Congrats!
• The weather has been bearable over the last few days and I've really enjoyed it!
• My family is happy, healthy, and we have everything we need--I feel truly blessed!!!!! I will quit whining now and bask in the positives.

Soccer, Swimming, and Jello Shots

Haley is getting ready to start soccer again and we are so excited. We had a blast watching her last year and she improved so much over the season. Her coach insisted that she come back to the team even though she took the spring off to play T-ball. The rest of the team is still the same and they will be the Ladybugs again. The team has taken things to a new level though and I must admit I'm a little nervous that I won't be able to keep up. The parents all got matching t-shirts to wear to the game, which makes it fun for the team. The treats after the game are no longer just a snack and a drink, it's a whole goody bag with ladybug themes. The parents are also into lots of parties. We were invited to a BBQ on Saturday at one of the players homes. It was so fun to see everyone again and hear about the season we missed. The kids were swimming and having a ball, then came the jello shots and I got a little nervous. Everyone was drinking and I envisioned the party taking a turn for the worst, but it was fun. Nobody got drunk and acted crazy. Overall everyone is very family oriented and really good people. I'm just not used to the drinking part of it. We're the only LDS family on the team so we need to do some missionary work! It is sure to be an interesting season! Haley can't wait to get out and start playing again. Practices start next week--still to HOT for me, but we'll make it!